One of the most common fears a couple have in the lead up to their day, is if they are actually going to enjoy it. The months and months of planning and attention to so many details, can lead couples to start becoming anxious about the day itself and along with wondering if their guests will enjoy the day, they start to question whether they will. One of the key reasons couples experience this fear of not enjoying their wedding day is that all of the ‘business’ starts to take over the enjoyment of it, even before the day arrives and then there is the day itself. As it becomes clearer and clearer just how much there is to do on the day, couples experience a fear that they just won’t have the time, or energy on the day to savour one minute of it.
If this sounds like you, I have 3 really simple tips to help you to relax and look forward to the moments you are going to share with each other and your guests on your Wedding Day and in the lead up to the day too.
The easiest way to stop thinking about all the details, like who is going to put the favours and place-cards out and what you are going to do if it rains, is to make a plan for every element of your day. If your wedding day is approaching, you have probably started doing this already, so my advice is to finish it off. Get that timeline for the day drawn up and whilst you are at it, do a transport timeline and checklist for the things you need to do the week before your wedding. There may still be details to be confirmed, but start building your lists anyway. You can always edit them as you go along.
If you don’t have a stylist or decorator and are doing this yourself, a handy tip is to do up a checklist of everything you need to pack for the styling of your day. Make sure you have a floorplan and if you have time, do a mock set up of a table, or place setting and take photos; these will be useful for anyone helping you with your set ups. If you have friends or family assisting you, do up a checklist for them too. Put dates you need to remember, or make payments by into your Calendar and set reminders, so you don’t have to remember.
What you should gather together depends a lot on your wedding and what elements are included within it. The advice here is to spend a day getting all of this information out of your head and onto ‘paper’. You will feel so much more organised when you can see everything written down and organised in a binder, or filed away in folders on your computer/iPad.
Of course I think this is a great idea, but wedding after wedding, I see how couples relax and start to enjoy the weeks leading up to the day and the day itself, because they hired an On the Day Coordinator. Your On the Day Wedding Planner can help you with getting organised with all of the details I have gone through above and they will be there to manage it all on the day, leaving you (and your family and friends who might have been helping you) free to simply enjoy yourselves. Yes, an On the Day Coordinator is an investment and when you have done all the planning yourself it can seem like an extravagance, but think about all the time and money you have spent on your day and ask yourself; do I want to be a tired, stressed and over-worked bride or groom, or one that eases into their day, confident that everything will run smoothly and an on the day, be able to focus on getting married and having a good time?
This tip is for both before the wedding and on the wedding day itself. The busier you get with planning your wedding the less time you might actually find to spend with each other. This can create distance between the two of you at a time when you want to feel connected. Some couples make a pledge to only talk about their wedding on certain days of the week and at certain times. Sunday mornings might be your wedding planning time for example and if you have any decisions to make during the week that can’t be put off, you spend 30 minutes going over them before dinner and then move on. Your relationship is more than your wedding, so try to keep up your normal routines as much as possible and do the things you love to do together as often as you can. Put some guidelines around when and how wedding planning occurs and if you are working with a professional trust their expertise, relax and enjoy life as a couple.
The I Do Crew Wedding Coordinators also make it a priority to help a couple get some time with just each other, on their Wedding Day. There is always a moment when you can steal away and soak up what you have just done and how special everything is. This might be after your photos and before you enter the reception for example. If you think this is something you will enjoy, take some time to talk to your Wedding Planner, or On the Day Coordinator about it, so they can make it a priority to make it happen for you on the day. Many couples tell me that this time together, is one of the things that look back on and appreciate the most.
If you have a tip for others, to help them enjoy their wedding day more, please share it with us in the comments.